And so it goes on like this --
wild things happen routinely
here at Artur's Studio

You say, so what's the big deal here?
THE ANSWER: a good Yom Kippur story is hard to find.
I only know one:
Repentance (by Israel Joshua Singer, I.B. Singer's older brother
and literary hero)
It's easily found in a real good paperback anthology entitled
Great Jewish Short Stories, edited and introduced by Saul Bellow.

My last question:
Do all these Jews with their Nobel prizes have a union?
And how do you join?
I could use the money too.


A STORY FOR YOM KIPPUR 5755

1. Fine dawn shop at 32nd St market, open 24 hours near USC
easy post-SELICHAH run, lots of places to smoke Malboros
$46 for good hard-to-get food and an easy two bus pop. I LOVED IT but next time I am going to insist on quadrupled plastic bags.
Otherwise it's too adventurous. You can also urinate outside in peace as the sun comes up before you say your morning BERACHAH(s?).

2. Felt sick, slept all day, shat three times (big ones, baby!)
Cleaned Artur's Studio a little. In other words I DID NOTHING.
But that earns me $43.43 around here a day, so I got free groceries from skinflint Pete Wilson in Sacramento, eh?

3. It's SELICHOS season around here. Nice and happy and serene this year. The alarm has been set for 5AM since the season began. I like it that way.

4. Realized in my post-Lesley musings I repeatedly sinned by GIVING HER NICKELS FOR WAKE UP HITS (to say nothing else.) I knew even then I felt guilt and shame every time, and under compulsion I should have resisted. But cute crack addicts (called 'strawberries') are hard to find.. and blah blah blah.

But I caused another to commit an act for which they are called *RASHAYIN. See ppp. 37-56 in my METSUDA SELICHOS.

* criminals


5. Having failed to get her to give up crack through "LOVE THERAPY" I offered to give up marijuana. This failure is described in GRAND HOPE FLOWERS ON FIGUEROA.

6. So what happened then you ask?

I decided to stop smoking REEFER (MOTA around here) after only a few million years and a few billion joints of MARIJUANA.

Think it'll work? A member of the REEFER MADNESS generation like me believes it will.

But who know? A good story is a good story I say...
and here's a winning title:
TESHUVAH 1, TOKE 0 (after many extra innings)

What do you think?

a. oesterreicher

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